New Column On VI Consortium Aims To Help Island Parents Successfully Raise Children

Beginning today, The Virgin Islands Consortium will publish a weekly column titled “Navigating Child Parenting”, written by Mutryce A. Williams, that aims to help parents successfully raise children in the Virgin Islands.

Ms. Williams, a native of St. Kitts and Nevis who resides in Frederiksted, views herself as a mother, writer, social commentator, advocate, columnist, educator, cultural conservationist, poet, artist, former diplomat, certified homeland protection professional and volunteer extraordinaire. She is an international relations and national security specialist who holds a doctorate in public policy administration with a double concentration in terrorism, mediation and peace and homeland security policy and coordination.

A former educator and child/youth advocate, Ms. Williams has relentlessly championed the rights of children and young persons for more than two decades. Ms. Williams views the column as a natural progression in her quest to make the world a much safer place for children and young persons. She enjoys a very ‘low key’ life on St. Croix and says the time has come to directly share her work with the people of this land which has given her two awe-inspiring little boys, Daniel and Nicholas.

“In our culture there is the premise that being a mother or knowing how to parent is innate. I have discovered that this is not the case. I have also come to realize that parenting isn’t just about the sleepless nights when the baby arrives or the financial sacrifices. It isn’t just about ‘minding or looking after the child’ rather it should be a conscious, deliberate act. Parenting is lovely. It is awesome,” she said. “You would hear me say time and time again that parenting is the most beautiful gift, however over the past six years; I have come to realize that parenting is work. I have come to realize that parenting requires an enormous investment of time. It requires patience. It requires deliberateness. It requires consistency. It requires reinforcing those behaviors that are positive and finding ways to eliminate those behaviors that are undesirable. It requires standing your ground and disciplining your child or children when it is necessary. It requires mindfulness and of course it requires immense love.”

She added: “ I have also found that there is this proclivity to judge, chastise or shame other parents, rather than provide the much needed support, and when I say support, I am not referring to social assistance programs or the like but rather common courtesy and understanding for the parenting struggle, because it can be a struggle. I recall once standing in line in the supermarket and my son was crying, he was an infant at the time. He was crying because was either hungry or sleepy. The lady standing in queue behind me began chiding me and saying that I should hit him a back hand in his mouth to shut him up. Her rationalization was that he was an unruly child and in her words, he was making me ‘look small.’ Instead of asking if I would like assistance or remaining quiet her solution to the problem, a back hand to his mouth. It is this type of thinking and lack of support, those that are embedded in our social fabric to which I refer.”

Ms. Williams revealed that the column came to her a few years ago while opening an attachment of an email sent by her friend, the late David Fox, that read, “Akheam’s Guiding Principles”.

“These were the principles or guide by which his son, an admirable young man lived. Mr. Fox was someone whom I dearly admired,” Ms. Williams said. “He was a family man and a very committed father. It reflected in his children. When he learned that I had become a mother, he began sending me words of encouragement, parenting advice and tips. I always looked forward to opening a correspondence from him. Then one day, I thought that I shouldn’t just keep these nuggets of advice to myself but rather that I should share them and this is how Navigating Island Parenting was conceptualized.”

The well accomplished Williams admitted that she is no parenting expert, but as a parent herself living on an island, the lessons she’s learned, she hopes, will help others avoid mistakes and the consequences that come along with them.

“I am trying my best to navigate this journey just like everyone else. Navigating “Island” Parenting is a submission of insights, quotes, tips and parenting advice that I have gathered over the years as a source of inspiration and as tools to deal with the daily challenges of parenting. I share in the hope is that this submission would cause parents to reflect on their parenting skills and also make the journey of parenting a bit easier or brighter for others,” she said.